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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25918291">opposites</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dainuhsoar/pseuds/dainuhsoar'>dainuhsoar</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, M/M, Omegaverse</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:27:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,095</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25918291</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dainuhsoar/pseuds/dainuhsoar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>19 days omegaverse where guan shan is an alpha but he's not really.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>He Cheng/Brother Qiu (19 Days), He Tian &amp; Mo Guanshan (19 Days), He Tian/Mo Guanshan (19 Days)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>67</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>392</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. first</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>coming off as an alpha isn’t something guan shan tries hard for. he shadowed his father, who commands a big organization, all the time when he was younger and developed a personality similar to the assertive alpha. his resistance to authority, leadership qualities, athletic prowess and quick temper all contribute to an intimidating alpha-like aura around him, but those are traits he was born with, it’s not like he can help how other people perceive him. and being a reserved only-child, guan shan spends most of his free time with his parents. he loves them and he’s not ashamed to admit he still hugs and holds on to his father for two seconds longer than he has to after their nightly conversations. it isn’t his fault that his father’s scent lingers on him and masks his already-weak omega scent.</p><p>sure, guan shan doesn’t correct others when they refer to him as an alpha, but it doesn’t mean he is ashamed of being an omega. he doesn’t care. but he does like the perks that only come with being an alpha, like how people listen to him in rapt attention or how they flinch from just a glare. maybe it’s guan shan’s persona that holds attention and intimidates people, but he knows the effect would weaken if they knew he is actually an omega. so he lets everyone think he’s an alpha. he’s not lying or pretending, no matter how many disapproving looks his mother shoots him. he knows she’s secretly glad he doesn’t need to deal with the harassment that often comes with being an omega.</p><p>omegas are typically submissive and decorative. their natural dispositions subject them to harassment of both the derisive and sexual kind, from both betas and alphas. alphas and betas are stronger, more commanding, while omegas are weaker, more yielding. elitist alphas prefer to marry and mate their own sex and class because they are more likely to breed alpha children. betas also prefer alpha partners for the same reason. omegas are in low demand, despite statistics showing that they’re more intelligent, creative and empathetic than the other sexes time and time again. they are also more pleasurable to have in bed and weaker to carnal desires, so there are many cases (too many, if you ask guan shan) where chauvinistic alphas or betas lure innocent omegas in (and many of them are lured simply due to their trusting nature and disposition to submit) for sexual intercourse and then toss them aside when they’re done.</p><p>guan shan’s mother said she’s one of the lucky ones. she met guan shan’s father when they were sixteen. once their eyes locked, they both knew they’d be each other’s mate, and his father would protect his mate from every alpha or beta that went out of line. according to her, love-at-first-sight between omegas and alphas, whose biologies are meant to be made for each other, aren’t rare occurrences, but many relationships fail because of societal pressures. guan shan is privileged to be born into wealthy parents. his father’s family runs a popular restaurant chain and his mother’s family is full of prolific scholars. she is a professor in omega studies herself. her parents are both alphas, though they married for love, as they claimed, and weren’t disappointed when they bore an omega. because of her respectful background, guan shan’s father didn’t have a difficult time convincing his traditional parents to give their blessing to his marriage with her.</p><p>two years after they married, guan shan was born. fourteen years later, he presented as an omega. his father had a meltdown over the phone when his mother, who was calmer about it, called to tell him the news. guan shan was at first afraid and worried because he knew how unfairly omegas are treated. he cried as he curled up in bed, his pillow soaked with tears, that night. and his mother crept into his room, wrapped him into her arms and told him he is far too clever to let anyone outsmart him, far too brave to let anyone cow him, and far too strong to let anyone overpower him. his father tiptoed in later, when he came home from work, kissed guan shan’s crown and promised to protect him from anyone who would dare harm him. he took his promise very seriously because he was the one who insisted guan shan spend all his free time with them. it’s not like guan shan minds, so he sticks to his father.</p><p>for three years, guan shan basks in his (fake)position as an alpha. all he has to do is scowl and both alpha and beta are backing away. he hisses when he is annoyed, and they shut up. he snarls when he’s defensive, and they whimper and flee with their tails between their legs. but he doesn’t abuse this (not-exactly-his) power; no, the omega in him reigns it in. he’s patient with people who are slow, understanding towards those who are troubled, and kind to others who are in need. he’s an alpha who has all the advantageous qualities of one and lacks the disadvantageous. he’s… unique, in the best way possible. guan shan basks in this label and then promptly wishes he never pretended to be an alpha when he meets he tian.</p><p>*</p><p>they met at the beginning of their last year of high school. he tian was a transfer student and he grabbed guan shan as he was passing by with a sandwich in his hand. he had dropped his sandwich in shock and was about to go <em> off </em>on his sandwich-ruiner, until a murmured apology in a deep, low voice and sharp, dark eyes stole his breath. the new student bent and picked up the wasted sandwich. guan shan eyed it in slight despair before nervously sliding his eyes back to the person holding the sandwich. he introduced himself as he tian and said that he was told mo guan shan, a boy with bright red hair and perpetually-frowny eyebrows (guan shan thought he tian added this part himself), could help him get to know the school. one of the teachers must have told him that, they relied on guan shan like that.</p><p>“i’ll show you around,” guan shan agreed. but in case he seemed too eager, he added, “but you’ll have to buy me another sandwich.”</p><p>“okay.” he tian shrugged. and then he stuffed the dirty sandwich into his mouth, which elicited a gasp from guan shan. “love your eyebrows, by the way.” his oily fingertips touched the end of guan shan’s left eyebrow, but the touch was brief because guan shan swatted him away in fear of someone catching them like this. he did not need a clueless, new alpha to bring suspicion to his second sex, especially when he was confused about the surge of desire to reveal as soon as possible that he is omega to said alpha.</p><p>guan shan sometimes looks at he tian and is reminded of how unfair the world is. he tian is lazy, indifferent and generally irritating, yet betas are scrambling to get out of his way, and omegas are scrambling all over themselves to get his attention when he walks into the room. all he has to be is tall, dark and handsome to be recognised as an alpha. he’s regarded and respected as one just because of his family background and appearance, despite the un-alpha-ness of his personality.</p><p>guan shan had shoved a red bucket into he tian’s arms and barked at him to fill it with water and soap so they could clean the windows, and he tian had smiled and told him he would be right back before turning in the direction of the toilets. and as guan shan watched he tian walk away, it hit him that it was the first time he didn’t have to glare at an alpha’s unwilling and hostile face after bossing them around.</p><p>guan shan wasn’t the only one he tian obeyed. he tian never had a problem with omega and beta teachers telling him what to do, even though alphas normally struggle with being given orders by omegas or betas no matter their age. he barely twitched even when being reprimanded. guan shan had passed by when he tian was being given a very loud and public dressing-down in the hallway by an omega teacher, and he tian wasn’t shame-faced, wasn’t angry, he simply looked like he didn’t care. he did smile and wave at guan shan though, and guan shan was infuriated when the teacher barked at him to join them. he received a lecture as well without having done anything except try to walk past. he punched he tian in the shoulder later, and he tian had to buy him lunch for three days’ straight before guan shan spoke to him again.</p><p>that was another thing. he tian showered guan shan with gifts, as if he were courting him. he believed guan shan was an alpha, there was no doubt about that, but it was unnecessary to court alphas like you would omegas. alphas do not need gifts or sweet gestures, alphas prefer the direct and pragmatic approach to relationships. any other alpha will feel insulted by he tian’s pink and red presents, over-affectionate touches and exaggerated compliments. he’s lucky guan shan, who only accepts the gift when it’s a cash voucher and rolls his eyes at he tian’s lip service, isn’t like other alphas. he once thought that maybe he should show some distaste towards he tian’s gestures to make him stop.</p><p>guan shan had snarled at the tiny pink box that he tian slid over the table towards him during lunch. he tian had looked surprised at guan shan’s reaction, and then a look of hurt flickered across his features before his face settled for a blank expression. guan shan had felt so bad for making he tian feel that way that he grabbed the box just as he tian was reaching to keep it away. he popped the cover open to find what he thought was a single black-diamond ear stud nestled in some satin cloth.</p><p>“it’s for the earphone jack on your phone.” he tian was grinning from ear-to-ear, and guan shan wanted to punch the grin off his face. he tian had stared at him until he pulled out his phone and pushed the earphone jack plug into its slot. he felt his eye twitch at the sparkliness of the thing, but he tian’s grin only grew wider at the sight.</p><p>maybe, just <em> maybe </em> , he tian is an omega parading as an alpha, just like guan shan is. maybe people just <em> think </em>he tian is an alpha because of the way he looks. he tian has never openly said that he’s an alpha before. of course no one really has to announce their sex verbally because their scent announces it for them, but guan shan has everyone tricked anyway, so anything is possible. guan shan thought he had found a kindred spirit, someone who was misunderstood like him. he completely disregarded the fact that his omega is always itching to reach out to he tian, which can only happen if he tian is an alpha. he ignored the way all the tension in his body seeps out whenever he tian has a hand or even a finger on him, which can only happen if he tian is an alpha. and he paid absolutely zero heed to how in sync he is with he tian’s emotions, which can only happen if he tian is his alpha.</p><p>it was with this fantastical mindset that guan shan walked up to he tian, who was waiting for him by the vending machines, that afternoon during lunch. he had smiled first, reached up and patted he tian’s head like he was a dog and then said, “i know what you’re going through is tough, but look on the bright side, okay?”</p><p>he tian had looked confused but pleased with guan shan’s initiative and open affection. he had smiled back and took guan shan’s hand before he pulled away. even after he kissed the inside of guan shan’s wrist softly, he didn’t let go. he just held the wrist in a loose circle between his fingers and smiled. guan shan let his hand be held, feeling his face warm. the moment was broken when an alpha passing by jeered, “fuck, is mo guan shan blushing like a fucking omega virgin?”</p><p>guan shan’s face immediately grew too hot, and he jerked his wrist from he tian’s grasp as if it burned. his arm shot out to grab the back of the asshole’s shirt but he tian had beaten him to the punch. even before guan shan could register what had happened, hetian’s fist had already landed. he had drawn back, clearly done with the fight but the other alpha saw red. he lunged at he tian with a roar, and it was guan shan’s turn to react first. he stepped in between the two alphas, his shoulder colliding with the attacker’s chest. they started to fight, tussling on the floor, so he tian joined in. and then the other alpha’s friends joined in and guan shan remembers thinking, <em> okay, so maybe he tian is an alpha after all </em>.</p><p>it was a big fight, but no one got severely injured. all the boys seemed to have calmed down after letting out steam during the fight, so they shook hands, apologised and forgave one another. because the reconciliation was quick and easy, they were each suspended from school for just five days. guan shan didn’t care about being suspended, but the cold shoulder his parents gave him from the moment they stepped into the principal’s office made him feel guilty as fuck. he tian sensed guan shan’s emotions, and patted his hand comfortingly all the while the disapproval and anger poured off his elder brother, who was standing beside him. it had been almost a year since they became friends and guan shan had been to he tian’s home a bunch of times, but this was the first he had seen the elusive elder brother. he looked about twice their age, and when guan shan peeked at the towering man, he felt like he could understand why he tian is the way he is. there’s no way anyone, alpha or not, can stand up to he tian’s brother, who never reeled in his alpha. guan shan moved his hand nervously out of he tian’s reach and muttered, “i’ll text you,” as his parents ushered him out.</p><p>“okay. love you.”</p><p>guan shan swore he could have heard a pin drop. the boys whom they had fought with were in the waiting room as well, but it wasn’t their reaction (which they had a lack of, as if they expected or knew it all along) that guan shan was concerned about. it wasn’t even he tian’s brother, whose aura grew darker and glare deepened, he was afraid of. his joints stiffened and his blood froze as his parents stared at he tian like he was nothing more than a cockroach they had crushed, torched and swept away. guan shan’s father would have started another fight right there in the office if mrs mo hadn’t dragged him away.</p><p>you couldn’t break the tension in the car on the drive home with a sledgehammer, and yet the warmth in guan shan’s chest bloomed and overflowed, he had to cover his face in his hands and pretend he was crying to hide the laughter that threatened to spill from his lips. his phone buzzed in his pocket and he scrambled to read he tian’s message.</p><p>“i love you, i love you, i love you. i hope you’re okay &gt;_&lt; i miss you so much. i love you.”</p><p>it suddenly felt like too much and it had sent guan shan straight into heat.</p><p>*</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. second</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>he tian and guan shan reconvene after their week of suspension from school. wew.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>they make out, but there's nothing over-pg13 about it. this is unbeta-ed, so all mistakes are mine.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>guan shan’s seat is next to the window. there’s nothing, really, about the view to distract him. the window is facing the back of the school, so there’s only a fence and the woods beyond that to look at. it’s not even a good place for delinquent students to hide out and smoke at because it’s so out in the open. nothing really happens besides the occasional latecomer who sneaks in from the back to avoid getting caught by the discipline master at the front gate. but any teacher who happens to look out the window will catch them anyway, so it’s not a commonly used route by latecomers.</p><p>this morning, guan shan is distracted by a particular latecomer who decided to use this route not because he was afraid of getting caught by the discipline master. he tian simply wanted to see guan shan. he waves at guan shan, standing in the middle of the yard and windmilling his arms.</p><p>guan shan can’t help the smile from spreading across his face but he tries his best to be subtle about it. he glances towards the front of the class - the teacher is still reading something off her notes, droning on and on. he waves his middle finger crudely at he tian, who blows him a kiss in defiance.</p><p>“get to class!” someone, probably a teacher, shouts from a window of the classroom next to guan shan’s.</p><p>at that, everyone’s heads turn toward the window. he tian blows another kiss at guan shan before darting into the school, and then all the heads turn to guan shan. laughter and murmurs break the concentrated tension in guan shan’s classroom. his partner sniggers and jabs him in his side, to which guan shan responds with a rough shove to his shoulder.</p><p>“focus!” their teacher commands, and the murmuring subsides.</p><p>but guan shan can’t concentrate on anything but how to kick he tian’s ass later for embarrassing him like that.</p><p>later comes after two and a half hours of guan shan trying to think of the best way to greet he tian when he sees him eventually. will it be good to leap on his back and do a headlock on him? or will it be better to just charge from the front and headbutt into his chest? because he tian is taller and guan shan just has to bend a little to do a nasty headbutt into his chest. no, he should just be up-front about it and strangle him. that’s what he’ll do. he’ll storm right up to he tian in the hallway, in front of their classmates all milling out of their classrooms to head to the lunch room. he’ll ignore he tian’s bright smile and glower at him. and when he reaches he tian, he’ll ignore the hands that he tian will put on his waist. guan shan will lift his own hands to he tian’s neck and ignore how big he tian’s palms are or how their warmth permeates through his uniform and caresses his lower back. guan shan will tighten his fingers around he tian’s collar, pull him in and think “what the fuck” before pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his lips.</p><p>he whispers, “hey,” and then rests the heels of his feet back on to the floor.</p><p>the hallway has become silent. guan shan can feel eyes on them but he’s too caught up in the way he tian’s eyes curve when he smiles.</p><p>“hey,” he tian says back. “i missed you.”</p><p>*</p><p>guan shan thinks he should’ve went with the first option. he should’ve leapt onto he tian’s back and put him in a headlock so he wouldn’t have to look at stupid he tian’s stupid face and stupid eye-smiles. it must be the smile that had made him kiss he tian in front of everyone. it’s that smile that makes guan shan tongue-tied and red-faced right now. they’ve found a spot near the classrooms that is pretty empty during lunch time. occasionally, a student walks past the little corner stairwell but they either don’t pay attention or pretend to pay no attention to guan shan and he tian.</p><p>they’re unbothered, yet guan shan feels nervous. he’s looking everywhere but at he tian and it’s a challenge because he tian is sitting so close to him, shoulder and arm brushing his, knee bumping into his, alpha scent coming off in sated and happy waves. his scent reminds guan shan of the problem at hand.</p><p>he tian hasn’t commented on the new cologne guan shan is using. he has received comments, both inappropriate and flattering, about his new scent from his classmates, so he knows it isn’t that his scent is too light to be noticed. since his heat last week, a strong scent giving away his omega has been lingering on him. his parents had noticed, told him about it, and his feelings of panic battled with his feelings of relief because <em> oh my god he tian will finally know i’m an omega </em>.</p><p>guan shan’s seat-mate, an alpha, told him his scent is <em> erotic </em> because he smells like an omega had been clinging on to him for the past week. an omega named jian yi, who was passing by, grabbed his arm and complimented him on his new cologne. “it makes your alpha scent stronger but not overpowering,” he said, big grin and everything. he asked guan shan where he bought it from, but guan shan couldn’t tell him without giving away that it’s the cologne that smells like alpha, not him.</p><p>right now, guan shan revisits a familiar battle between feelings. he’s relieved that he tian hasn’t noticed he smells like an omega but he’s upset because <em> he tian hasn’t noticed he smells like an omega </em>. even when he’s seated so close.</p><p>guan shan risks a peek at he tian from the corner of his eye. naturally, he tian is staring at him. guan shan’s breath catches in his throat and his eyes dart away again.</p><p>“are you feeling okay?” he tian asks.</p><p>“yeah…”</p><p>“i’ve never had a fever that lasted a whole week,” he tian continues. “i was worried about you.”</p><p>“i texted you the first day, didn’t i?” guan shan grumbles.</p><p>“yeah, but i was still worried.”</p><p>guan shan grits his teeth, suppresses the fluttery, ecstatic warmth spreading in his chest.</p><p>“so if you’re okay now,” he tian is leaning in too close for comfort. guan shan leans away from him instinctively. “can i kiss you?”</p><p>“no.” guan shan’s reply is swift, even if the tips of his ears turn red.</p><p>the “please” that he tian releases is soft, breathed into guan shan’s shoulder by gentle lips but which burn a trace.</p><p>guan shan sighs with a shudder. he may as well give he tian what he wants now so it doesn’t become a prolonged problem. he looks around to check if there’s anyone else around, and when the coast is clear, he gives he tian a small peck on the lips. he tian’s hand is fast. he grabs the back of guan shan’s neck and crushes their lips together. he crowds guan shan against the stair railings behind him, pulls guan shan’s thigh over his and steals all of guan shan’s oxygen. his kisses have bites, and his bites have kisses. he takes all of guan shan’s gasps of breath and and turns them into fuel to kiss more. guan shan doesn’t know how much time has passed when he tian finally pulls away. when he opens his eyes again, he tian’s eyes have just finished sweeping over his face. and he doesn’t get a chance to speak because he tian leans in to take him again.</p><p>*</p><p>it’s the realisation of a slight pressure at his crotch that forces guan shan to push he tian away. he tian snatches a light nibble before they part. he’s still angled towards guan shan and his eyes are still hot on guan shan’s lips. he licks his lips and he would’ve stolen guan shan’s mouth again if guan shan hadn’t said what he said next.</p><p>“i’m not ready for this.”</p><p>he tian frowns. he finally backs away, disgust, not with guan shan but with himself, all over his face. “i’m sorry.”</p><p>guilt (and fondness) squeezes at guan shan’s chest. he knew he tian would be wholly un-alpha about this. a typical alpha will growl and accuse guan shan of leading them on. they’ll get angry and demand more kisses.</p><p>“no- that’s-” guan shan stutters. “it’s my parents.” the frown on he tian’s face eases. “they don’t want me jumping into a relationship with an alpha when i haven’t experienced what it’s like to be with an omega.” his tongue trips over the word 'with', but he tian doesn't seem to notice.</p><p>it’s not entirely a lie. they said they don’t want guan shan to be jumping into a relationship with an alpha because he’s lying about his second sex. guan shan has reworded it to his liking, so what if it’s entirely a lie?</p><p>“why do you need to experience that?”</p><p>“because,” the thing about lies is, under pressure, they come naturally. “they think an omega is more suitable for me.”</p><p>the stare that he tian levels on guan shan is making him uncomfortable. “i can be submissive if that’s what you want,” he says.</p><p>irked, guan shan snaps, “that’s not all it takes to be an omega.”</p><p>picking up on guan shan’s irritation quickly, he tian says, “then tell me what it takes to be one because i want to be what you want.” he says it with too ease for guan shan’s comfort.</p><p>“how would i know what being an omega is supposed to be like?” a twinge of pain strikes at guan shan’s heart for him to admit this.</p><p>he tian sighs in frustration. “is it something you want or your parents want?”</p><p>“it’s what they want,” guan shan confesses. he tian’s face immediately lights up. “but i can’t disappoint them.” his face falls again.</p><p><em> we don’t want you to get into a relationship with an alpha when he doesn’t know you’re actually an omega </em> , is what guan shan’s mother had told him. after his heat was well and over, guan shan’s parents sat him down to give him a stern talking-to. they know his heat was triggered by he tian, so they know that guan shan has strong feelings for him, but they don’t like the fact that there is a possibility their feelings are only mutual because he tian thinks guan shan is an alpha. <em> you saw his brother, do you think he’s the type who respects omegas as people? </em> guan shan’s father demanded. <em> do you think that friend of yours won’t have the same opinions? </em>guan shan’s post-heat mind had blinked the words ‘my mate’, which he wilfully ignored.</p><p>if guan shan tells he tian that he is an omega and he tian still wants him after, guan shan’s parents will support him in their relationship. until then, they want guan shan back home right after school every day.</p><p>so all guan shan has to do is tell he tian the truth. all he has to do is open his mouth and say, “i’m actually an omega.” because there’s no way he tian won’t still want him, right? he tian with the daily ‘i love you’ messages he sent to guan shan during his week of heat; he tian with his intense stares and tender touches; he tian with his desperation-filled voice when he said <em> i want to be what you want </em>.</p><p>he tian who is already everything guan shan wants and wants and wants.</p><p>“it’s okay,” he tian murmurs. his hand slides over guan shan’s. “i’m not giving you up, but if you can’t do this right now, it’s okay.”</p><p>it isn’t an alpha’s place to tell omegas ‘it’s okay’. why doesn’t he demand more? why can’t he just <em> be </em> a proper alpha and then <em> maybe </em> guan shan will be forced to <em> be </em> a proper omega?</p><p><em> just say it, </em> guan shan thinks, <em> just tell him you’re an omega </em> . he runs his tongue over his dry lips. he sucks in a deep breath and opens his mouth. <em> i’m an omega </em>, he thinks, and he closes the space between them, cradles he tian’s face in his hands and kisses him with the force of a very desperate omega, which, guan shan learns a second later from he tian’s lips, is extremely similar to the force of a very desperate alpha.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>do let me know if you can't follow the story because it's confusing. i have the story in my mind so i may accidentally leave out some info that i thought i've already written.</p><p>i can't promise regular updates but i will try my best to finish writing this.</p><p>thank you so much for leaving comments and kudos!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. third</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>hetian's side of the story.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tags are updated. =)</p><p>you may notice that i changed their names in this chapter so they don't contain a spacing. it's just for readability's sake.</p><p>this story hasn't been beta-ed so all errors are mine.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>hetian thinks he’s a shit alpha, and he isn’t the only one who thinks that. his own father, for one, hadn’t failed to remind him everyday. hetian is convinced even hecheng thinks that of him. he doesn’t say it, but he used to scoop hetian into his arms and carry him back to his bedroom whenever their father came home. in trying to protect hetian from their father, hecheng caused hetian’s alpha to feel inferior and incapable.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it doesn’t really matter. because hecheng would consistently take responsibility for hetian, their father had eventually forgotten hetian existed. it got him off hetian’s back at the expense of heavying the burden on hecheng’s. hetian knows how much abuse hecheng went through at their father’s hands just to protect his younger brother, so hetian tries his best to be obedient to his older brother, another alpha.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>an alpha succumbing to another alpha inevitably leads to a suppression. hetian’s alpha had become soft, calm, almost indifferent. his scent had become gentle, a natural blend of domineerance and flowers. even his senses had dulled and he had trouble telling people’s scents apart. he got so frustrated with it, he decided to just give up trying to figure what someone is and paid more attention to who they are instead. hetian’s alpha is so </span>
  <em>
    <span>mellow</span>
  </em>
  <span> that he’s often mistaken as an omega whenever he’s with qiu-ge, hecheng’s right-hand man, who is an actual omega.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian once thought qiu-ge was more than a right-hand man to hecheng. the two of them met in high school. after hecheng graduated from university, he started working for the family. he was still in contact with qiu-ge and recruited him. he was a constant presence in hetian’s life; if hecheng wasn’t around to take care of hetian, he would ask qiu-ge to babysit him. qiu-ge was the one who taught hetian to ride a bike. hetian loves him as much as he loves his own brother. initially, he thought that was what hecheng meant when hecheng grabbed qiu-ge’s wrist as the latter was about to leave and said, “i can’t live without you.” when hecheng spotted hetian standing at the doorway, staring at the scene in front of him, he hastily dropped qiu-ge’s hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>qiu-ge scowled at hecheng and then herded hetian to bed, muttering something like </span>
  <em>
    <span>your brother hurt his neck</span>
  </em>
  <span> as if that had anything to do with what happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it was only when hetian turned thirteen and understood what longing gazes looked like or when touches were too long just to be touches. he started to notice that hecheng treated qiu-ge different from his other subordinates, like how qiu-ge was the only one given a room in their house, he was the only one who ate at their table (when their father wasn’t around), and he was the only person hecheng allowed into his bedroom, besides hetian.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>their father didn’t find out until years later. on the morning of hetian’s seventeenth birthday, he found himself sprinting down hallways, still in his pajamas, desperate to reach the front gate.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>the last he saw of qiu-ge was his disappearing back as he rode away on his motorcycle. when hetian turned around to walk back to the house with tears brimming his eyes, he saw hecheng close behind. he had a look of despair on his face but when he saw hetian, he took a deep breath, straightened and asked, “what are you doing out here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng’s facade would have been believable if his voice hadn’t broken at his last word. hetian had spent the rest of his birthday with his brother, knowing his brother needed the company more than he did. their father was home, but he’d rather be cooped up in his office than celebrate his son’s birthday with him. he came out to have dinner with them, only to order hetian to his room when hetian asked why he </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking sent qiu-ge away</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it wasn’t long after that that hecheng came into hetian’s room one day and told him to pack his bags.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“we’re moving out,” he said. “found us an apartment.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“are you leaving the company?” hetian asked, knowing the answer but praying for a miracle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no. father’s new family is moving in.”</span>
</p><p><span>and he wanted hetian and hecheng out of the way. but not completely,</span> <span>because without hecheng, the entire family business will crumble, probably.</span></p><p>
  <span>“are we going to find qiu-ge?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng didn’t answer. he just laughed and then ruffled hetian’s hair before strolling over to hetian’s wardrobe to pull out his suitcase. “just pack up,” he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian gladly did, chest feeling lighter already at the thought of finally leaving their father. so they packed their bags, moved to a fancy top-floor apartment in the city and enrolled hetian in a whole new school. hetian thought he would get to spend more time with hecheng now that it was just the two of them but it turned out to be the opposite. the office was farther from their apartment than it was from the house, and the car that ferried hecheng to and fro was obviously less mobile than qiu-ge’s motorcycle, so hecheng had to leave the apartment early and would return home late.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian would have minded it more if he hadn’t made a friend the moment he started at the new school. his new friend had hair the colour of flames and a personality to match it. hetian was the one who approached him on his first day, but guanshan kept finding him after their first meeting. and hetian loved it. it wasn’t love at first sight, but something akin to it. it was his second month at the new school, and he was having problems with the homework because they were ahead of hetian’s previous school. it was the first time guanshan came over to the apartment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan ooh-ed and ahh-ed at their furniture, at the ceiling-to-floor windows, at how high above them the chandelier was. hetian was reminded (once again) that </span>
  <em>
    <span>guanshan really isn’t like other alphas</span>
  </em>
  <span>. other alphas get defensive when another alpha displays signs of wealth or power. alphas will try to bring up the wealth and power that they have too so that they can get back on equal standing in their own minds. guanshan did none of that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>he went straight to the refrigerator and rifled for ingredients to make sandwiches with. he pulled his tie loose and unbuttoned his collar, grumbling about how uncomfortable it was. he refilled the electric kettle and plopped tea bags into two mugs without asking hetian which cups they could use. he was already acting like he </span>
  <em>
    <span>owned</span>
  </em>
  <span> the place. hetian couldn’t decide whether that was the </span>
  <em>
    <span>most</span>
  </em>
  <span> alpha thing an alpha could do, or it was the least because no alpha hetian had met had ever done anything like that. </span>
  <em>
    <span>no one</span>
  </em>
  <span> had done anything like that.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>then again, i’m not a regular alpha too,</span>
  </em>
  <span> hetian thought. he didn’t feel an ounce of anger. he suspected a normal alpha would be enraged by guanshan’s self-entitlement. he hoped guanshan didn’t do this at other people’s houses. he hoped guanshan was so comfortable only because he felt he and hetian were close friends. </span>
  <em>
    <span>we’re close friends</span>
  </em>
  <span>, hetian thought. a happiness overwhelmed him and he couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan’s head snapped up from the mugs he was pouring hot water into. he saw hetian laughing and then he started laughing too. his smile was wide and toothy, showed off his little canines. “what’s so funny?” he asked, still smiling at hetian.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it was that moment that hetian realised he was in love. he was in love with the idea that guanshan wanted to take part in something that made hetian happy without caring about what it was that was making hetian happy, </span>
  <em>
    <span>as long as hetian was happy</span>
  </em>
  <span>. at least that was what hetian felt. he wanted to believe it; he wanted to believe that guanshan cared that much for him. he wanted to be in love, not with the idea, but with the person who brought forth the idea.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>later, he bit into the sandwich that guanshan made for him and realised guanshan remembered to leave out cucumbers, which hetian didn’t like. he reached over for his cup of tea, but guanshan stopped him, told him to leave it because it was still hot. he opened the textbook guanshan was lending him and found sticky notes labelled “for hetian”, “hetian, take note here” and “hetian, this is important” in between pages. he sat close to guanshan, their thighs touching and shoulders brushing, and he was so distracted that he had to ask guanshan to explain something again; guanshan teased him, pretended like he was annoyed and explained it again, this time slower and checking in with periodic “okay?” and “you get it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>after they were done studying, guanshan yawned and asked if he could take a nap. hetian led him to his bedroom and watched as guanshan crawled under hetian’s blanket. while snuggling into bed, he murmured, “smells like you.” </span>
</p><p><em><span>i want them to smell like you too</span></em><span>, hetian thought. it hit him that his feelings weren’t for an idea he loved. they had always been for guanshan. he suddenly hated that he couldn’t tell scents apart, so he probably wouldn’t smell guanshan on his sheets even if his scent lingered. he had always been prideful about how in</span> <span>control he was with his emotions, so it came as a shock when he was struck with a feeling of possessiveness over the boy in his bed. in a momentary flash, he’d wanted to stride over to the bed and kiss him. he didn’t know how tightly he was gripping the doorknob until he closed the door behind him after stepping out of his room.</span></p><p>
  <span>hetian tried to return to studying but he could only stare at the page, pen unmoving. all he could think about was guanshan. guanshan in his bed. he was a hormonal teenager in love, there was no way he could stop his thoughts from wandering. even if he could, his body was already reacting. he felt hot, </span>
  <em>
    <span>ashamed</span>
  </em>
  <span>. guanshan only thought of him as a </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>. he was known as the ‘reliable guy’, so he must be thoughtful and kind to everyone. hetian wasn’t special. hetian felt irrationally jealous.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“do you know how to answer that question?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian jumped and whipped his head round. guanshan was hovering over his shoulder, so their faces were suddenly entirely too close. but the red-headed boy was unaffected, just glanced at hetian and then back at the page without moving away. he looked refreshed. the only sign that he had just woken was his messy hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian closed the book with a slap. he stood up abruptly, forcing guanshan to take a step back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“time to go?” hetian asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan looked surprised at the change of subject. “i was thinking of making dinner for us… but if you want me to go…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“um,” hetian paused, “yeah.” he had never been one to mince on words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan didn’t look upset, just confused. but he didn’t ask why. he straightened his tie with habitual ease, hefted his backpack onto his shoulders and made a beeline for the front door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“wait,” hetian said as they stood in the doorway. he combed guanshan’s bedhead down with his fingers. “do you need me to bring you to the bus stop?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no, i remember it.” guanshan was staring. he stared until hetian laughed nervously. and then he smiled too, slowly. “what’s so funny?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>unconsciously, hetian’s hands had cupped guanshan’s cheeks. guanshan didn’t seem to even notice. it was as if all he could pay attention to was hetian. hetian felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>special</span>
  </em>
  <span>. he wanted to kiss him again, this time the desire was stronger. this time, he felt he really could do it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“your bedhead,” hetian said. his voice sounded hoarse to himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan laughed, and then he took a step away, his face slipping from hetian’s hands. as he walked to the elevator, he waved goodbye. and then he stepped into the lift, the doors shut as he gave hetian one last wave, and he was gone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian went straight to his bedroom and lay on his bed. he pressed his nose into his pillow and breathed in deeply. he could smell </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but he didn’t know what it was, only that it brought him comfort and peace. he continued taking deep breaths, and it was in the indent of guanshan’s figure in his mattress, the leftover warmth of guanshan’s body on the sheets, and the desperate belief that it’s guanshan’s unique scent that hetian fell asleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>*</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian made it clear that he was wooing guanshan. he showered him with gifts. he gazed longingly at guanshan until guanshan turned to glare at him. he constantly told guanshan he’s cute, he’s handsome, he’s cool until guanshan blushed and snapped at him to shut up. he put his hand over guanshan’s and guanshan didn’t move away until he reached for his sandwich, red-faced and avoiding hetian’s eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian thought for sure guanshan loved him back. he even accepted the pretty pink box that contained the dust cap. hetian had thought long and hard about which colour best represented his feelings whenever guanshan was around and settled on pink. there was a moment where guanshan looked like he wasn’t going to accept the gift, but then he did. and it delighted hetian. he felt his feelings were being reciprocated, although a small part kept reminding him that it could all be one-sided. guanshan never really initiated anything affectionate.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>until he did. and it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>adorable</span>
  </em>
  <span>. guanshan had strode straight up to him and patted him on his head. he said something that hetian didn’t quite catch because happiness was bubbling inside him and he wanted to kiss guanshan. he caught guanshan’s hand before he could retrieve his hand, and decided he could at least have this, which was a light kiss to the inside of guanshan’s wrist. guanshan’s face turned red, like his hair, like hetian knew it would, but his palm curved naturally to rest against hetian’s cheek. hetian leaned into it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>and then some asshole ruined the moment by making a stupid comment. hetian was pissed at the comment because it embarrassed guanshan. but he was also pissed because this was the first time guanshan was doing something </span>
  <em>
    <span>cute</span>
  </em>
  <span> without being prompted and that asshole </span>
  <em>
    <span>ruined </span>
  </em>
  <span>it. he threw the first punch and in an argument among alphas, it was inevitable that a full-on fight would break out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian met guanshan’s parents for the first time, but he wished it was under better circumstances. he saw guanshan glance at his elder brother and wondered what guanshan thought of hecheng, who was oozing irritation. and then guanshan’s hand slipped out from under hetian’s and he muttered, “i’ll text you.” as he stood to leave with his parents.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“okay. love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it had slipped out of hetian’s mouth unintentionally. but when the words were out, he didn’t want to take them back. he meant them. guanshan looked like a deer in headlights. and then his lips wobbled and he had to bite back a smile. he was hastily shoved out of the principal’s office by his mother, who had to drag mr mo behind her. mr mo looked like he wanted to strangle hetian. finally, after the mo family were out of the office, hetian turned to his brother.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“that’s guanshan.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i know.” hecheng rolled his eyes. “you showed me his picture before.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>*</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian wasn’t afraid to admit he talked about guanshan probably way too often to his brother. hecheng had to know about the person hetian is going to spend the rest of his life with anyway. that day was no different. in the car ride home, he enthused about how cool guanshan was in the fight. he bragged about how guanshan came up to him in the hallway and patted his head. hecheng interjected with “are you a dog to him?” which hetian purposefully ignored in favour to prattle on about guanshan.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“what’s his scent like?” hetian asked. “i’ve always wanted to know. is his alpha scent strong, like yours? or weak, like mine?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng frowned at his brother. “your scent isn’t weak, you know. but his is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“really?” hetian said. “but he’s such a strong alpha.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yeah, you’ve told me.” hetian was about to go into a recount of that one time guanshan told off another alpha for cutting hetian’s queue, but noticed hecheng was hesitating to say something. he waited. finally, hecheng continued, “you didn’t tell me who his mother is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian’s brows furrowed in confusion. “i told you she’s a professor.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yes, but,” hecheng hesitated again, “you didn’t tell me she’s one of the main organisers of the omega ball.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>anxiety crept up in the borders of hetian’s joy. “i didn’t know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yeah, well,” hecheng said. “she’s also on the vetting panel.” he pulled the car into park. they’d reached the apartment building.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you said you weren’t going.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“only because i thought i’ll never pass the vetting process.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“and why do you think differently now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng licked his lips. he took a deep breath and let it out harshly. hetian knew what hecheng was about to say next was killing him. “because now i know my brother is dating a panel member’s son.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you don’t even know if qiu-ge is going to be there.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i know he is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“he fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>left </span>
  </em>
  <span>us,” hetian spat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“fuck that. i don’t care.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng’s voice was rough, gravelly. his fingers tightened around the steering wheel. he was hunched over in the driver’s seat, as if trying to make himself smaller. he looked ten years older than he was, and yet the despair on his face matched the expression he had on the day qiu-ge left. hetian’s eyes slid to hecheng’s nape, covered as always by a high collar.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“please don’t tell me he gave you the bite,” hetian growled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng chuckled darkly. “omegas don’t give the bite.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“they can if their alpha is fucking stupid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hecheng didn’t move. and then he said, voice barely over a whisper, “he doesn’t have my bite.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian buried his face in his hands. he pressed his fingertips into the inner corners of his eyes. he breathed deeply, rubbing his hands down his face as he did so.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>so </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>was what hecheng meant when he had grabbed qiu’s wrist and said, </span>
  <em>
    <span>i can’t live without you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>thank you for leaving comments and kudos, and bookmarking this fic. please continue to do so :')</p><p>once again, let me know if anything is confusing! (the end may be confusing because nothing has been explained yet)</p><p>edit: the kudos on this work has surpassed my previous highest record :0 thank u all again!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. fourth</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>guanshan makes a new friend.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>someone else came into guanshan’s life recently. he has pale blond hair, thin eyebrows and approximately two brain cells. he talks a lot and does little of anything else. and he swears that he’s not trying, but he keeps bumping into guanshan since the day he grabbed guanshan by the wrist and told him he smelled nice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“it must be fate,” he said, big grin on his face, when guanshan tried to hint that meeting him everywhere was a hindrance rather than a happy surprise. hetian laughed while guanshan rolled his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi is tall, slender and pretty. he’s an energetic loud-mouth but his looks make him popular among the student body. why he’s choosing to hang out with guanshan so much lately is a mystery. he isn’t only popular in general</span>
  <em>
    <span>, </span>
  </em>
  <span>alphas like him. a lot of alphas like him. legend has it that jianyi gets a confession, in the form of either a love letter or a “meet me after school” situation, every week. guanshan has noticed, in the short time he’s been getting to know jianyi, that the beautiful omega is always getting greeted and when he greets them back, they blush and giggle as they scurry away. even the most bull-headed alphas do that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>so guanshan decides to keep him around. he decides he can learn a thing or two about being an attractive omega from jianyi before he, um, tells hetian anything. that’s right, he’s choosing to keep hanging out with jianyi solely for that reason. it definitely has nothing to do with jianyi being charming and fun and easy on the eyes, absolutely nothing to do with all that at all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>besides, even if guanshan doesn't want to be friends with jianyi, hetian is more than happy to keep jianyi around. guanshan knows his alpha is wrapped around jianyi’s little finger. he thinks jianyi is a riot, the omega is always making him laugh. they don’t go 10 minutes without jianyi cracking a joke that makes hetian cackle his head off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan never finds himself alone with jianyi for more than 5 minutes. hetian’s radar for them is as accurate as jianyi’s radar for bumping into guanshan. it started with jianyi hanging out with guanshan all the time, but now if there are 2 of them, the third one is almost always just around the corner.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>the matter of jianyi being more attractive than guanshan in every regard, not just as an omega, isn’t very worrying. jianyi will go on and on about this “guy of my dreams” every chance he gets. he hasn’t told guanshan the guy’s name, but guanshan can guess who it is. jianyi doesn’t hide it either. there’s only one boy who jianyi greets, instead of the other way around like usual, and when that boy gives a terse nod of acknowledgement back, jianyi swoons and has to lean against guanshan as support.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>there isn’t anything special about zhan zhengxi, at least to guanshan anyway. he’s tall and handsome, and he’s a basketball player, but he isn’t as long-legged as jianyi, better looking than your average good-looking guy, or the captain of the basketball team. guanshan has heard only favourable things about zhan zhengxi, though. if someone wants to slack off cleaning duty, they should ask zhan zhengxi to cover for them, for example. zhan zhengxi has a cute little sister whom he waits for at the train station every afternoon. zhan zhengxi remembers all his classmates’ birthdates and get them presents even if he’s not close to them. zhan zhengxi has broken up countless fights before they even start and gets bullies to back off without involving teachers. he seems like a nice, noble guy whose only flaw, if it is even a flaw, is that he doesn’t have a lot of money.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>a nice alpha without money is just a nice alpha, and who would want that for a mate? jianyi, apparently.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you have the same vibe as him,” jianyi once said. “that’s why i like you so much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan doesn’t know what “vibe” he’s referring to. the only thing he and zhengxi have in common is that they’re both pretty non-talkative… maybe jianyi doesn’t know a lot of non-talkative alphas. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“is the silent, stoic alpha image your type?” guanshan asked. he didn’t get to hear the reply to that question because hetian had appeared, begging loudly for guanshan to help him with his homework. that prompted jianyi to shriek because he had forgotten his class had a test tomorrow and then proceeded to hang off guanshan’s unoccupied arm and beg guanshan to help him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi is fun to have around. guanshan and jianyi have gotten surprisingly close over the few weeks they’ve known each other. guanshan enjoys having a friend who’s an omega. omegas tend to be a little wary of him. he appreciates jianyi’s carefree nature. he doesn’t care about status. he looks at “vibes” only and guanshan, though he’ll never admit, is glad he has a “vibe” that jianyi connects with. being friends with jianyi doesn’t really help him become a more attractive omega, guanshan realises, because they’re completely different. it doesn’t matter anymore, so he quickly gives up on that idea and gives in that he simply </span>
  <em>
    <span>wants</span>
  </em>
  <span> to be friends with jianyi.</span>
</p><p><span>when guanshan gives in to that, he also decides that he wants</span> <span>to be closer to him. he wants to confirm his suspicions that the one jianyi is in love with is zhan zhengxi.</span></p><p>
  <span>they’re sitting at the bleachers of the indoor stadium during their break. there’s a casual game of basketball going on, and one of its players is zhan zhengxi. (hetian is on the opposing team, but guanshan is trying not to pay attention to that.) jianyi is popping chips into his mouth but he keeps his eyes on the tanned figure zipping across the basketball court. zhengxi has the sleeves of his uniform pushed up to his elbows, his fringe is swept to the side nonchalantly, and all his attention is on getting the ball to his teammate. he’s really handsome, guanshan thinks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“is zhan zhengxi the guy you keep talking about?” guanshan finally asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi tears his eyes from the court. he stares at guanshan with wide eyes until his signature grin blooms on his face. “yeah. he’s cute, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“you’re from the same class, you can talk to him any time you want.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“oh,” jianyi turns back to watch the game, “we used to be friends.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>there was no way zhan zhengxi could have resisted jianyi’s charms. he should have fallen right into his palms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“what happened?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i told him i like him, and then we stopped being friends.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it doesn’t make any sense.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“and what’s wrong with him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>because it can’t be jianyi’s fault. jianyi is great.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi shrugs. he’s trying to look like he doesn’t care, guanshan notices. “i know you think i’m great, but there’s probably something about me that turns him off. i’m not his type.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan resolutely ignores the way jianyi had practically read his mind. “but that’s no reason to stop being friends with you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“it’s probably to discourage my feelings for him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yeah, like distancing from him has quelled your feelings for him.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi turns to guanshan again, eyes sparkling. “thanks.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“for what?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>the grin on jianyi’s face grows. he puts his hand over guanshan’s. “for caring about me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>maybe it’s better if he and zhan zhengxi don’t get together, guanshan thinks, the world will implode if such an attractive couple exists.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“sorry!” an apology comes before the basketball actually hit guanshan’s head, so guanshan believes hetian </span>
  <em>
    <span>meant</span>
  </em>
  <span> to throw the ball at him. rubbing the sore spot on the back of his head, guanshan glares at the boy jogging towards them. “the game is over, so…” he takes the basketball from jianyi, who’s laughing at the both of them. “go to the canteen with me, xiao mo?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan narrows his eyes at hetian, not appreciating the insincere apology. “you better buy me a sandwich.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian grins. “i’ll get you whatever you want.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan stands up, sighing like accompanying hetian to the canteen is a valiant effort. “anything you want, jianyi?” he asks the boy next to him. he’s already distracted by zhan zhengxi stripping his top off across the court.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no, thanks,” jianyi says breathily.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>alpha pheromones are coming off hetian in waves, likely due to the sweat he had worked up. guanshan takes measures to keep an arm’s length away from him as they head towards the canteen. hetian laughs at guanshan’s indiscreet hint that he stinks. guanshan hates how hetian’s laughter grows more and more akin to the jingle of bells each day. he hates how his eyes keep veering to peek at hetian’s biceps in the grey muscle tank he’s wearing. he’s so distracted by how he hates everything that he’s taken aback when hetian seizes his arm all of a sudden and drags him into an empty classroom.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan is crowded against the door. hetian’s hands find their way around guanshan’s waist to tug the redhead closer to him. he kisses guanshan, fusing their lips together and then pulling back to nip at guanshan’s lip before going back in again for a kiss. guanshan’s eyelids flutter closed, his arms wrap around hetian’s back, and he makes an embarrassing sound when hetian’s tongue touches his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>they part breathlessly. they rest their foreheads together and let their breaths mingle. hetian’s eyes are still closed when guanshan opens his.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i needed that,” hetian whispers. he kisses guanshan once more and finally leans away. guanshan refuses to let him go too far, keeps him locked in his arms. he buries his face in the crook of hetian’s neck. hetian takes that as permission to grab handfuls of guanshan’s ass. in response, guanshan grinds down against the thigh propped between his legs. he can feel hetian freeze. “don’t do that.” his voice is hoarse.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan’s face is burning as he untangles himself from hetian. “s-sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no, come here.” hetian hugs guanshan, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>hugs </span>
  </em>
  <span>him. guanshan’s arms are trapped against his sides and he finds it quite unfair that he can’t touch hetian back. “don’t get too close to jianyi.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan’s mind blanks for a moment. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i’ll get jealous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan laughs. “you’re lying.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian is apparently so shocked guanshan would think that that he pulls back. his eyebrows are drawn, concern all over his face. “i can get jealous too, you know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“no, you don’t.” when hetian rolls his eyes instead of having something to say, guanshan thinks he’s won the argument this time. “you don’t get to talk. you’re the one who acts like he’s the funniest person on earth.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“what does that have to do with anything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“nothing, just-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“do i need to remind you that </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re</span>
  </em>
  <span> the one who wants to be with an omega?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan stiffens. and he can tell from hetian’s look of regret that he knows guanshan is hurt. they step away from each other. he can’t fault hetian there. he </span>
  <em>
    <span>has</span>
  </em>
  <span> said that before. it’s his own fault. the tension between them is palpable. hetian never has a problem with apologising but he isn’t going to say sorry when he knows he’s right. guanshan isn’t expecting an apology either, but neither will he apologise for something he can’t confess yet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“he makes you laugh more than i do, that’s all,” guanshan says after a pause of silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>hetian huffs out a laugh. “if you’re jealous, just say so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan looks him dead in the eye. “i’m jealous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>it takes hetian off-guard. he takes a step closer and captures guanshan’s mouth in a searing kiss once more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“don’t worry,” hetian murmurs when they part. “i’ll never mate with an omega.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan swears his heart stopped beating for a second. when the beating resumes, its speed is notched up so high, he has to breathe harder to keep up. his body is working in a paradox, where his blood goes ice-cold even though his ears and cheeks are fire-hot. his head spins as his eardrums ring but all he can hear is the echo of hetian’s words. he thinks he’s staring at hetian but all he perceives is the way hetian’s lips had moved around the word “never”.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>his breathing resumes only when he realises hetian has kissed him again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“are you okay?” hetian asks when guanshan doesn’t respond to his kiss.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“y-yeah,” guanshan croaks. “um.” he swallows the lump in his throat. “you don’t want an omega?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i have nothing against them,” hetian explains. “they’re just difficult for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“oh…” guanshan doesn’t get it. but if he hears anymore, he’ll be sick. “i’m going to head back to class.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“i thought we’re going to the-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>guanshan opens the door hastily and fucking books it. he doesn’t stop until jianyi grabs his arm and forces him to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“hey, where’re you running off to?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“class,” guanshan replies breathlessly. “didn’t the bell ring?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“not yet,” jianyi says. “you were with hetian? you okay?” his eyes rake over guanshan’s face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“yeah.” guanshan genuinely does feel better, as if the short run has taken away some of his uneasiness. “um, he told me to head off first. you done ogling at zhan zhengxi?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>jianyi laughs. “don’t make it sound like i’m in heat,” he complains. “besides,” he makes a show of sniffing the air. “you’re the one who smells like it.” before guanshan can ask what he means, jianyi continues, “i’ve been thinking about this for some time now - guanshan, you’re an omega, aren’t you?”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>if you would like to read more of my writing (snippets, drabbles, even some full fics), go to my tumblr: https://dddainuhsoar.tumblr.com/</p><p>:')</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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